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Psst, pass it on

Swiped from lostakasha, the top 10 TV fictional characters I wouldn't sleep with, even if you paid me:

1.) Gaius Baltar (BSG) - Yes, he's smoking hot, but have you noticed the CRAZY? Also a short-sighted, narcissistic, selfish prick.

2.) Duncan Kane (VM) - Leaving aside the obvious age difference, he's (in the words of Josh Lyman) a hairdo. A dull-as-a-doorknob cardboard cutout with about as much personality as a sea sponge.

3.) Jack Shephard (Lost) - I'm pretty sure I'd have to kick him square in the balls within five minutes of meeting the guy, and what good would he be in the sack then?

4.) Gob Bluth (AD) - Funny as hell, but a sensitive, gifted lover? I'm guessing no.

5.) Sam Seaborn (TWW) - Yes, he's adorable, but just... no. Even if he didn't have any Rob Lowe in him, Sam falls squarely in the Friend Zone.

6.) Simon Tam (Firefly) - Too uptight. Too timid. Too dull. Too neat. Too preoccupied with his sister.

7.) Luke Danes (GG) - Two years ago he would not have been on this list. Today? I can barely look at him without feeling vaguely nauseated. Thank you GG writing staff.

8.) Charles Bingley (P&P, any version) - I mean, really, who would? Doesn't matter how much money he has, you'd always be dreaming about that steamy best friend of his.

9.) Preston Burke (GA) - See Simon Tam above, re: too uptight; too neat. Also too intense and too cold.

10.) Rupert Giles (BtVS) - Dude. He's Giles. It's like doing it with your dad. And I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
mikijean
May. 19th, 2006 05:32 pm (UTC)
Heeeeeeeeeeeeee.

1.) Gaius Baltar (BSG) - Yes, he's smoking hot, but have you noticed the CRAZY? Also a short-sighted, narcissistic, selfish prick.

Also, you'd eventually cause the downfall of humanity, just be being attractive.

2.) Duncan Kane (VM) - Leaving aside the obvious age difference, he's (in the words of Josh Lyman) a hairdo. A dull-as-a-doorknob cardboard cutout with about as much personality as a sea sponge.

Yes, plus--and this is just one woman's opinion--I think he has chlamydia. Which I'm told is not a flower. And the cuddling is apparently the best part.

8.) Charles Bingley (P&P, any version) - I mean, really, who would? Doesn't matter how much money he has, you'd always be dreaming about that steamy best friend of his.

:cough!:bride&prejudice:cough!:

Good call on Gob, though.

austin360
May. 19th, 2006 07:51 pm (UTC)
And the cuddling is apparently the best part.

Cause apparently, he's not doing it right...

Bride & Prejudice forevah!
hannasus
May. 19th, 2006 10:17 pm (UTC)
Bride & Prejudice doesn't count because that character had a different name. Charles Bingley = no. Balraj Bingley = an enthusiastic YES!
em_meredith
May. 19th, 2006 05:36 pm (UTC)
2.) Duncan Kane (VM)

Oooh, yes. Also, he's all forehead. I think he may be related to Dawson.
snowdrifted
May. 19th, 2006 05:40 pm (UTC)
But. But. But... Giles! Did you remember the part where he sings and plays guitar? And the nice eyes? Just me? I'll be over here...

Gob Bluth! Bwa! I totally agree. Gaius would be all sexy for a bit, but then I'd just feel dirty.
hannasus
May. 19th, 2006 10:19 pm (UTC)
Sorry, sweetie, I just can't think about Giles that way, handsome as he is. He's such a father-figure. But, hey, less competition for you!
snowdrifted
May. 20th, 2006 12:44 pm (UTC)
*g* Oh it's cool. I only recently came around to Giles shippily, me. I love him as a father figure to Buffy too and have really been enjoying that lately looking through all these screencaps!

And should he need some TLC on the side I'm here. :D

I gotta say this meme is hard. I'm going to have to think a while to come up with 10. I think when I get into fandom I fall in love with all the characters at least a little bit.
hannasus
May. 20th, 2006 02:01 pm (UTC)
It is a hard one. And I tried to pick characters that might be considered attractive, rather than the obviously skeevy or geriatric ones.
makd
May. 19th, 2006 09:50 pm (UTC)
Only two disagreements with your list, IMO: If I were in my 20s or 30s, I'd do it with Jack. I was hot then, and he'd be willing.

If I were still in my 40s or 50s, I'd do it with Giles. I'm 61, so for me, Giles is a younger man! ;-)Of course, if I were in my 30s, there's no way I'd do it with Giles -- he'd be too old for me then, so I understand the revulsion.

hannasus
May. 19th, 2006 10:23 pm (UTC)
It's not so much the age as the fact that he's Buffy's father-figure and I tend to think of the characters the way Buffy does.

It's the same way with Keith Mars--he's awesome and he's much closer to my age than Veronica is, but I relate to the characters through her eyes, so I can't bring myself to look at him That Way.
mikijean
May. 20th, 2006 05:00 pm (UTC)
You know what that is? A Very Strict Policy. Yep. Welcome to the club, sister!
qill13
May. 19th, 2006 11:09 pm (UTC)
Hee! I'm afraid that I'll have to disagree on Giles, though I'm more or less on the same page with the rest of the list. (Burke...so hot, and yet so cold.)

Still on the fence about Luke, largely because I haven't watched the last five or six eps of GG. Maybe I never will--I'd like to keep my Luke Danes lust.
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )

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