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Yeah, so I didn't so much get my Emmy picks posted before the show, did I? I tried. Honestly I did. Only, I found that I just couldn't bring myself to care. Most of the nominees are so blindingly mediocre that I seriously did not give a crap who won. And I'm so used to the Emmys being completely out of touch with my tastes that I never expect any of the nominees I actually like to win.

In fact, I didn't even watch the show on Sunday night. I Tivoed through it in fits and starts over the course of the day yesterday. Conan was funny. Greg Garcia's speech rocked. Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert are love. Otherwise, meh.

Anyway, instead of trying make predictions about nominees that put me to sleep, I decided create a Television Academy of One. That's right, what follows is a list of what the nominations would look like if it was all up to me.

The Sus Academy of Television Arts and Sciences presents the 2006 Emmy nominees (winners indicated by a ***):

Comedy Series
Arrested Development ***
My Name Is Earl
The Office

Actor in a Comedy Series
Jason Bateman, Arrested Development ***
Zach Braff, Scrubs
Steve Carell, The Office
Jason Lee, My Name Is Earl
Tyler James Williams, Everybody Hates Chris

Actress in a Comedy Series
Jenna Fischer, The Office
Lauren Graham, Gilmore Girls
Felicity Huffman, Desperate Housewives
Jane Kaczmarek, Malcolm in the Middle
Mary-Louise Parker, Weeds ***

(It's important to note here that my Television Academy would have given Lauren Graham and Jane Kaczmarek their Emmys already.)

Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Will Arnett, Arrested Development
Michael Cera, Arrested Development ***
Justin Kirk, Weeds
John Krasinski, The Office
Ethan Suplee, My Name Is Earl

(This category is soooooo hard to narrow down. If I had unlimited space it would also include Rainn Wilson and B.J. Novak from The Office, John C. McGinley from Scrubs, and Kevin Nealon from Weeds.)

Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Angela Kinsey, The Office
Jaime Pressley, My Name Is Earl ***
Jessica Walter, Arrested Development
Nadine Velazquez, My Name Is Earl
Liza Weil, Gilmore Girls

Directing in a Comedy Series
Zach Braff for Scrubs, "My Way Home"
John Fortenberry for Arrested Development, "Development Arrested" ***
Marc Buckland and Ken Whittingham for My Name is Earl, "Barn Burner"
Greg Daniels for The Office, "Drug Testing"
Paul Feig for The Office, "Office Olympics"

Writing in a Comedy Series
Jim Vallely and Richard Day for Arrested Development, "S.O.B.s" ***
Neil Goldman and Garrett Donavan for Scrubs, "My Way Home"
Hilary Winston for My Name Is Earl, "Y2K"
Mindy Kaling for The Office, "The Injury"
Rolin Jones for Weeds, "The Punishment Light"

Drama Series
Battlestar Galactica ***
The Closer
Grey's Anatomy
Veronica Mars

Actor in a Drama Series
Hugh Laurie, House ***
Edward James Olmos, Battlestar Galactica
T.R. Knight, Grey's Anatomy
Bradley Whitford, The West Wing
Enrico Colantoni, Veronica Mars

Actress in a Drama Series
Kristen Bell, Veronica Mars ***
Allison Janney, The West Wing
Mary McDonnell, Battlestar Galactica
Sandra Oh, Grey's Anatomy
Katherine Heigl, Grey's Anatomy

Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
James Callis, Battlestar Galactica ***
Jason Dohring, Veronica Mars
Aaron Douglas, Battlestar Galactica
Omar Epps, House
Isaiah Washington, Grey's Anatomy

Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Chandra Wilson, Grey's Anatomy
Tricia Helfer, Battlestar Galactica ***
Tina Majorino, Veronica Mars
Lisa Edelstein, House
Chloe Sevigny, Big Love

Directing in a Drama Series
Michael Rymer for Battlestar Galactica, "Lay Down Your Burdens" Parts 1 & 2
Jeff Woolnough for Battlestar Galactica, "Downloaded" ***
Peter Horton for Grey's Anatomy "It's the End of the World (As We Know It) Parts 1 & 2
David Shore for House, "No Reason"
Martha Mitchell for Veronica Mars, "I Am God"

Writing in a Drama Series:
David Weddle and Bradley Thompson for Battlestar Galactica, "Downloaded" ***
Ronald D. Moore and David Eick for Battlestar Galactica, "Home" Parts 1 & 2
Russel Friend, Garrett Lerner, David Shore for House, "Euphoria" Part 2
Shonda Rimes for Grey's Antomy, "Thanks for the Memories"
John Enbom for Veronica Mars, "The Rapes of Graff"

Variety, Musical, or Comedy Series:
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart ***
The Colbert Report
Late Night with Conan O'Brien

Reality Competition Program:
Honestly? I can't be bothered to care about any of them much. So whatever. Insert your own favorite shows here.

Animated Program:
The Simpsons
The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy
Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends ***
South Park



( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 29th, 2006 10:27 pm (UTC)
Ok, I like ALL of your picks, but I have a new special soft spot for you because you included Foster's Home and you picked it to WIN. Heeee!
Aug. 29th, 2006 10:30 pm (UTC)
Ok, but James Callis should be given strict instructions not to wear all white and a trucker's hat to pick up his Emmy.
Aug. 29th, 2006 11:00 pm (UTC)
That list? Is why hannasus + austin = OTP. Forever. We should get that tattooed on our asses.
Aug. 30th, 2006 01:09 am (UTC)
Hooray! You've finally decided on a tattoo!
Aug. 29th, 2006 11:11 pm (UTC)
I would like to officially request permission to join the Sus Television Academy, cause your world is much better than the real one.

Was S.O.B.s the episode of AD when the boys finally taught George Sr. a lesson? Cause that was a good one.
Aug. 30th, 2006 01:39 am (UTC)
Dude. Your Academy rocks.
Aug. 30th, 2006 07:56 pm (UTC)
Me lovey the Sus Academy long time. I especially love the moving people around from "assumed" categories to where they should actually go.

And good call on Liza Weil and Nadine Velazquez--I completely forgot them!
Sep. 5th, 2006 12:42 pm (UTC)
Moving people around was the only way I could fill out some of the categories. And let's face it, although West Wing wasn't great this season, Bradley Whitford had more screen time than any other character and did some of his best work, despite the mediocre writing he had to work with. And no one actually watches Grey's Anatomy for Meredith Grey--they ought to change the title to Alex, Izzie, George and Christina.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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